Terrible Film of the Week Club - Q

Today marks the start of a new feature on Sweenster.Com: The Terrible Film of the Week Club. To be in the club, all you have to do is see the movie and then comment on it. Sort of like Oprah's Book Club. Except way gorier. So without further ado, the inaugural film is:


Q follows David Carradine as he investigates an evil Aztec cult in New York City. The cult (who look like they're from New Delhi) are sacrificing people to bring back the ancient god Quetzalcoatl, a giant monster made obviously out of clay. That's an odd idea for a monster and the film's tagline seems to address this:

It's name is Quetzalcoatl... just call it Q, that's all you'll have time to say before it tears you apart!

Touché marketing department. Now throw Michael Moriarity into the mix as a bank-robbing piano player and you've got a big bucket of weird.

So let me give you some reasons why you must see this movie:

• The gore. This movie has some of the most ridiculous gore I've ever seen outside of a zombie film. One corpse in particular would make the guys from CSI cry.

• The monster. I know you're looking at that poster thinking, "That is sweet!" I thought the same thing when I bought this movie (although I was thirteen at the time). But it's only fair I should warn you: the monster looks nothing like that. It looks like a big bird made out of clay. And you only see it for a total of about four minutes. But those four minutes are hilarious.

• Michael Moriarity. I don't what drugs this guy is on but if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say all of them. His performance is absolutely psychotic. There are several parts of the movie where instead of reading his lines, he just starts scat singing. I often wonder if he was paid to be in this film or if he just showed up on set one day and they couldn't get rid of him.

So go see Q: The Winged Serpent. It may just make you a better person. But most likely, the opposite.